Human Library Book Review: Publicly Fat in Australia. 

A personal and very interesting reflection offered by Raina, the publicly fat person book in a recent Human Library in Australia. Read the blog article and gain insight into an up close and personal experience and about being exposed to prejudices and stereotypes. The following has been taken from her blog that was published in three parts. One part was written after being introduced to the Human Library and voluntering to be a book. The second part is about impressions from the preparation meeting. Finally the last part is about her experience with readers at the Human Library. Its recommended that you read the entire article originally published by BIGFATBLOG.COM to get the full impression of Raina´s day in the Human Library.

"Publicly Fat in Australia" by Raina Lee.

Part 1 - Getting involved.

I work at a university in Australia as an academic. Part of my job is being the 'Women in Technology' program coordinator, and recently we had one of the staff come talk to us about a 'Human Library' project on our campus, as part of multicultural week. People volunteer to become 'books' for a day, and borrowers can 'borrow' a book for a half- hour conversation about their life experiences. The idea is to confront prejudice and break down barriers.

I believe this is a wonderful project, and I volunteered to be a book. My “blurb” was:

FAT PERSON - "I think one of the biggest 'light bulb' moments in my life was when I realised that I am not a broken thin person. I'm a person with feelings, dreams and aspirations - and those don't all revolve around the size or shape of my body." In an atmosphere of hysteria about the obesity crisis, what is it really like being a fat person today? Have a read and find out.

I wanted to challenge and attract people who buy into the 'omg omg the obesity crisis we are all going to die' mindset. I also wanted to refer to myself in the book 'title' as a fat person, because the word 'fat' is so loaded with moral undertones, and putting it together with 'person' is making a statement in itself.

I'm relatively new to the whole notion of fat acceptance. I'm currently continuing to de-program myself out of thinking that being fat is the source of life's problems, and reminding myself I'm just as worthwhile as any other human being. While I think I'm making progress in just 'being,' I haven't really moved into being an activist or trying to educate/inform others before this. I guess I’m moving out of my comfort zone!

Here in Australia things are becoming quite difficult for fat people. The media are really pushing the 'OMG WE ARE THE FATTEST NATION ON EARTH WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE' line and I've noticed more negative reactions and quite rude antagonistic behaviour from people in public recently, compared to, say, ten years ago.

We are starting to get media articles (a lot of them) about how our fatness is costing the government more in healthcare. It sucks getting larger sizes of clothing, particularly if you live outside the state capitals. I live in a large town, but I buy most of my clothes from the net, simply because I literally cannot fit into anything here. Clothes that will fit me around my body, are short (I’m 5’9”) or built for top-heavy women.

Our cinema seats are not made for people with large butts (I have been to many other cinemas where I fitted in seats with room to spare, so it's the choice of seats that the cinema has made.) Our area has many cute trendy cafes -- most with tiny, armed chairs that I can't fit in, so I don't go. I sometimes feel alienated because there is so much media attention about how terrible it is to be fat. People buy into it, and treat me differently because of it.

But, I'm healthy. I do a lot of things that everyone else does. I've tried every diet known to man (and know from experience they just make you fatter!) and no longer diet at all (and won't ever diet again.) I was fully expecting the question on the Human Library day, "But why don't you just diet? Don't you have any willpower?"

I felt like I was putting myself up there as a target, but if someone 'borrowed' my 'book,' then they must have been willing to lay down at least some of their prejudice, don't you think?

PART 2: - The preparation meeting .

When I went to the information session for 'books,' my 'book title' was by far the most confronting for others and the reactions (physical) were really interesting to watch. We went around a circle and identified our 'book title' and said a little about why we chose it and why we wanted to get involved in the project.

When it got to me, some of the other books had a really strong reaction to my comments - some of them were nodding vigorously and turned around towards me, but some crossed their legs away from me, folded their arms, refused to even look at me, shook their heads, etc. I thought it was quite interesting because these people are 'living books' in a diversity/anti-discrimination project! Apparently it's ok to discriminate against fat people, in their minds.

After the first part of the session, we were to split into pairs and try out being alternatively a 'book' and a 'reader' (as a trial run). I was matched with someone who then said, "Oh, can I swap? I think I know this book," so I was just standing there. Then one (lovely) woman said "Oh, can I please be matched with Fat Person? I'm really wanting to read that book!"

She was an older woman who was quite thin, and she shared with me straight up that she had been terrified that she was fat her whole life, and had been bulimic for 20 years. She wanted to know how I got to the point of being ok in my skin, and not listening to the craziness that is the media. She also wanted to know what discrimination I had faced (I talked about doctors/getting health care, buying exercise clothes, being accosted by strangers in the street). I emphasised that I got out and about, had friends, and had a relatively normal life, and that the constraints I experience were due to general non-accommodation of body size diversity.

I think it was eye-opening for her, and I felt quite positive about it all - I was then looking forward to Thursday when I would do it for real, with members of the public!

PART 3 - After the event  (Aug 20th).

I was 'borrowed' almost straight away by a petite, beautiful woman from Indonesia, who wanted to know what it was like being me. She assumed I wouldn't be able to do most things (go to the cinema, fly on planes, go swimming) and was surprised to hear I had done/was doing all those things. After asking me quite a lot of questions, she shared with me her childhood when she was ten kg lighter than her current weight, and how her parents wouldn't let her eat dinner because she would 'get fat'. Instead she watched everyone else eat and was given a half glass of milk. She was very open to understanding that our notions of 'normal' and 'average' were not probably correct, and that people came in all shapes and sizes.

The 'librarian' actually had to stop our conversation as I was 'booked' for my next session! And so it went - I was busy for the whole time!

I had a wide variety of people 'read' me - from a woman who was quite tall/thin and said she varied in weight up and down ten kg, but how she hated herself when she was at the high end and didn't know how to stop wasting the energy on it -- she wanted to know how I had moved from being focused on body size to just getting on with life -- to a self-confessed exercise fanatic who at first didn't understand how I could be fat while having had such a history of 'successful' dieting (i.e. long periods of very little calorific intake), but was very, very open to listen, and ended up saying she wanted to get back to me and support the idea of a HAES group on campus(!).

Another person I talked with was an 18-year old recovering anorexic/bulimic who wanted to talk to me about body acceptance in teens, and wants to eventually go out into the schools and talk to teens about body image and acceptance, discrimination, and how healthy bodies are all shapes and sizes.

Most were shocked when I said I had received insults, attacks, been belittled by people I didn't know, abused by doctors.

One of the women who talked to me was talking about stereotypes, and I said that people had assumed that I was dirty, smelly, un-organised, out of control and unintelligent. Her response was, "Well, I can understand the first things...but you are so not unintelligent!" and then she realised what she said.

I said, "Well, actually, I'm none of the other things either," (with a smile, because I knew she didn't mean it as an insult) and just paused for a moment. I could see the proverbial penny drop for her. Because even though she considered herself as enlightened, she had bought into all those stereotypes.

She told me afterwards that she assumed I spoke regularly to groups about fat acceptance, and when I said it was my first time, she was stunned. She told me I should!

There was a lot of discussion about the media's connection of 'health' with 'losing weight,' and people were quite open to believe that a fat person can be healthy - mainly because they probably see me doing a lot of stuff around campus and I'm obviously not unhealthy.

The second-last person I talked to was a fat woman who was bigger and taller than I am. I have actually spoken to her a little around campus before, but we haven't really talked about the experience of being fat. This was the hardest session for me.

She came to the session to talk to another fat person about how terrible the New South Wales government was because it won't put WLS on the public health scheme...so she can't afford it. "And I just need to get the weight off. If I got the weight off, I could do so much...you know what I mean - you are there, you are feeling the same things," (argh.)

I wasn't even sure what to say to her, because I have so been there, but I'm so not there anymore! I did mention that maybe in her quest to be 'healthier' (her euphemism for losing weight), that having weight loss surgery with its poor 'success'-rate, and myriad complications, she would end up unhealthier than she was at the moment.

I tried to bring it back to acceptance so many times, but realised she wasn't hearing me (which was very frustrating). So I found some common ground (inability to buy clothes in our town) and shared what I had done to fix that (buying from Ebay/online sites), and then talked about being proactive in changing circumstances -- instead of waiting to 'get thin' before doing anything.

I think I did help a little and I promised to give her some resources - one of which was the book If Not Dieting, Then What?, which started me on the path to acceptance that I was fat, and not a thin person trapped in a fat body. I know the book is not perfect, by any means, but it helped put a big chink in my armour, and has for other people I know as well, so I thought it might be a good starting-point for her, since she just was on a totally different plane than where I am currently.

But I did battle in my head afterwards, wondering if I said the right things to people, whether I did educate in any way, whether I helped. And the day afterwards I had a bingeing episode which was just nuts (haven't done that in years!) I don't know whether it was a reaction, or if thinking about it all just catapulted me back into that mindset, or what. But I'm ok now, and back to believing that it was a very positive experience. It helped that the people who participated were there to confront their own prejudices, and were open (mostly.)

There was recognition amongst the 'librarians' that I was the book that was most likely to receive negative reactions, and they were quite concerned about me afterwards, offering me counseling if I needed it (!), but I told them I was fine, and the people were great.

'Readers' gave feedback to the librarians that they had been really challenged and had changed their minds about quite a few things. It was confronting, challenging, positive and negative, all rolled up into one. And if I had the chance to do it again, I would, like a shot.

There seems to be so little FA in Australia – it’s just not heard about here (at least not where I am!) I think people look at me as though I’m crazy when I first say that I’m not on a diet, and have no intention of being on one. I don’t think of myself as brave. It’s just like I’ve woken up from a bad dream and finally ‘get it.'

I wish there were more opportunities to talk to people about this. Too often it's because someone abuses me, tries to tell me I should be dieting, suggests WLS or similar…and then I get defensive. This was completely different, and was really good.

Someone said to me before I did this, that it was great that I was going to be 'publicly fat,' and that just stuck with me as such a wonderful phrase. So during the living library when people asked me if I spoke like this other times I said "no, this is my first time being publicly fat!" and then laughed (because of course I'm publicly fat all the time, because I'm fat and I'm out there doing stuff!)

It made me think that all of us that are out there, just living our lives and getting on with it instead of obsessing on limitations, abusive people, diets, etc., are being some sort of activists whether we realise it or not -- because we are speaking with our lives.

- Article brought courtesy of